Why Being Bored Is Good for Your Mental Health

How often do you allow yourself to be bored? 

Boredom has a reputation for being a negative state of mind, but boredom actually has benefits for your mental health, like improving creativity, curiosity, and self-control. 

Everyone’s brain is different, so boredom can be an individual experience. Some people’s brains (like certain folks with ADHD, for example) crave more stimulation and experiences, and so their threshold for what’s boring will be higher than someone whose brain works differently. What makes you feel bored won’t necessarily make your best friend or sister or coworker or neighbor feel bored. 

Boredom doesn’t mean mindlessly numbing out, like by scrolling through social media. Boredom, without distractions, can make you feel restless or distressed because it forces you to feel your feelings and be in the present moment, both of which are hard to do.  

Feeling bored can feel stressful for a few reasons:

Cultural pressures 

In our capitalist world, we often measure ourselves by our productivity levels, even if we don’t realize we’re doing it. It always seems like there’s something else to do and that taking a break is lazy or selfish. Remember, you don’t exist to be productive. You can do absolutely nothing and you’d still be a person worthy of love, care, and respect. Offer that love, care, and respect to yourself when you feel cultural pressure to always keep busy. 

Unused to being with yourself 

Being present with yourself can be hard, even painful. When we’re in the moment with no distractions, it can be hard to deal with the thoughts, feelings, and urges that come up. Sometimes we stay so busy that we don’t leave enough time to check in with ourselves and process our thoughts and feelings. It can feel scary to slow down enough to be with yourself, especially if it’s been a while. Learning how to be present with yourself takes time, so don’t be too hard on yourself when it’s tricky. 

We are afraid of being boring (vs being bored)

There’s a somewhat common phrase that says “only boring people get bored.” Beliefs like this contribute to people being afraid to be bored, even though boredom is actually good for you. 

Just because you have moments of boredom in your life doesn’t mean that you yourself are boring. It’s impossible for you to be entertained every single minute of every day without being disconnected from yourself and your needs. Figuring out how to take care of yourself requires introspection, or looking inward and feeling our feelings, even when they’re hard. Doing this doesn’t make you boring - it makes you human. 

Unsupportive coping behaviors

Some people fear or resent boredom because of the way they (or their loved ones) cope with  being bored. Coping skills are meant to help us through tough situations, but they don’t always support us long-term. Some people cope with boredom by acting in self destructive ways or by lashing out at others. Some people cope by using substances or engaging in risky behaviors. Not everyone copes this way, but the negative associations you might have with how people cope when they’re bored might contribute to the way you think about boredom. 

How is being bored good for your mental health? 

Even though being bored can bring up some complicated feelings, it’s actually beneficial to your mental health in a few ways. Being bored: 

Gives you time to process

Our brains do a lot in the background, even when we feel bored. When we give ourselves time to rest and do nothing, it gives our brains a chance to process and encode what’s going on. It takes a lot of cognitive power to go through day to day life, and giving your brain a break lets it play catch up. 

When you’re bored, this processing might be done in the background, where you don’t notice it, and sometimes you might process things more mindfully. Thinking through your day, reflecting on things you learned, and even daydreaming can help you process your thoughts and feelings if you give yourself the time to do it. 

Boosts creativity 

Have you ever tried to figure out a problem, and then after taking a long shower or a nap, the answer felt like it was right in front of you? Sometimes giving yourself some space to be bored and to do nothing frees up your brain to find new solutions or make connections that you couldn’t make with so much on your mind. 

Boredom when done right, with no distractions, gives your brain a chance to wander. You might notice new things that you’ve missed before, or reflect on what’s going on. Using your imagination in moments of boredom can help you think in ways you don't normally, which can help boost creativity. 

Allows curiosity

Our brains crave excitement and novelty, and when you’re bored you give yourself a chance to be curious. Curiosity and our search for excitement often lead to important breakthroughs on a personal level and on a cultural level. Being bored can help people think of new solutions to problems, or to take action on something important. Without boredom, we would have fewer opportunities to be curious and explore new things. 

Improves self-control

Learning how to be bored is a skill that many of us have forgotten about, or didn’t learn in the first place. We have screens with us almost constantly now, so it’s really easy to avoid boredom by finding somewhere to scroll. Letting yourself be bored gives you a chance to exercise a little self-control instead of opting for mindless distraction. 

Getting yourself comfortable with the uncomfortable feeling of boredom is an important skill.  There are lots of uncomfortable emotions out there that we can’t avoid. Learning how to regulate yourself emotionally during those moments is a skill that you can rely on in the future, no matter what comes your way. 

Are you looking for more ways to support your mental health? Working with a therapist is a great way to learn more about yourself and what your specific needs are so you can feel more aligned with who you are. Reach out to our office today to get started on your mental health journey.  

8 Ways to Upgrade Your Self-Care Routine in 2022

8 Ways to Upgrade Your Self-Care Routine in 2022

Does the new year get you in the mood to make some changes? The idea of a fresh start is enticing, and the end of the year can be the perfect time to evaluate what’s working for you in your life and what you want to change in the year to come. Of course, not everyone likes making big changes at the new year (or sometimes people feel pressured to change by advertising and social media), so the idea of making a change now doesn’t sit right with everyone. If that’s the case, feel free to read over these suggestions and save them for a time when you are making a change. 

One impactful way to make a change is to reconsider and upgrade your self-care routine. The last two years have thrown a lot at us, and in turn it’s helpful to amp up the way we care for ourselves in these difficult times. 

Upgrading your self care routine can be as quick as putting reminders in your calendar to pick up your prescriptions or scheduling an appointment with a therapist. It can also mean reconsidering how you currently take care of yourself and letting go of practices that no longer serve you. 

Everyone is different, so everyone’s self-care practices and preferences will look different. It’s easy to get into the comparison game these days with everyone else’s highlight reel literally a click away, but try to focus on what you’re doing for you, not on what everyone else is doing. Even if someone’s life seems perfect, they undoubtedly have some stuff they’re dealing with behind the scenes. Your self-care routine should give you space to rest, relax, and rejuvenate, as well as feel creatively and emotionally fulfilled. 

As it happens, we have a ton of ideas for how to upgrade your self-care routine in the new year. Each suggestion leads to a more in-depth post on the topic so you can dive deep if you want to. Here they are:

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

“When you’re constantly putting yourself up against someone else–out of either admiration or jealousy–you’re not seeing the other person as a full person. You’re only seeing the one thing that is provoking an emotional reaction out of you (a picture of their vacation, a post about their promotion, etc.). It can lead to jealousy, even resentment in your relationships.

Another way comparison can cause harm is the way it leads you to over evaluate yourself. While self awareness is good, like all things it needs moderation. Excessive self awareness and self evaluation will get you stuck in your head, overthinking, and preventing you from actually meaningfully engaging in the present.”

Work on Being Nicer to Yourself

“Self-compassion is being nice to yourself. The idea of self-compassion is drawn from Buddhism. Being kind to yourself might sound really simplistic, but it can be a lot harder than it sounds. Many of us have a voice in our heads that chimes in when we mess up. That voice is called the Inner Critic, and it can be hard to notice it sometimes. 

There are times when we’re so immersed in beating ourselves up that we don’t even consider that there’s another option. However, there is always another option. Being kind, gentle, and understanding to yourself is always a choice you can make, it just takes practice to remember that that’s an option.”

Get to Know Yourself Better

“Do you have to get to know yourself? It’s not required, but understanding yourself on a deeper level can increase your overall happiness, reduce the sense of inner conflict you feel, and help you feel more empowered. The better you know yourself, the better decisions you can make. 

You know what your boundaries are and what your needs are. You’ll be able to resist peer pressure or comparing yourself to others, because you’re confident that the path you’re on is right for you (and if you’re not on the right path, you’ll have a map to it when you understand yourself on a deeper level). Not only will it be easier to make decisions and exercise self-control when you get to know yourself better, but you’ll also feel more understanding toward others.”

Dedicate Time to Being Creative Regularly

“Creativity in any form helps us to express our feelings. Whether that’s through writing, singing, dancing, painting, sculpting, etc., creativity gives us an outlet to be freely vulnerable and authentic. 

Through art, music, movement, or other forms of expression we can start to unpack and understand our feelings, and what those feelings are telling us about ourselves, our needs, and our desires.”

Start Using Affirmations

“Research shows that using affirmations can essentially reprogram your mind. Instead of sticking with your old patterns of negative thinking and self-talk, affirmations teach your brain to make new connections. Getting into the habit of using affirmations can also help you get more familiar with the patterns in your day to day thoughts. When you notice what’s going on, you can do something to change it. 

Another great thing about affirmations is that you get to choose them. There are so many things about life that we can’t control and can’t change. One thing we can control is how we think. If you find negative thoughts and assumptions creeping in, you can choose to engage with them or not. You can decide to think about positive things to try to shift that negativity.”

Reparent Your Inner Child

“If growing up you didn’t feel safe and loved and listened to, then because of your inner child, there is still a part of you holding onto that fear. And that fear has likely affected your life as an adult–even though the experience was so long ago. As the adult you are now, you are able to identify what in your inner child needs healing, and then provide them with it. This is how you work as both parent and child within yourself. You are the child, hurting. And you are the parent, helping them heal. 

When you start building a life that makes your inner child feel safe and loved and listened to, you are able to let go of those coping mechanisms you used when you didn’t feel safe and loved and listened to. In this way, inner child work helps you reach the future you want by healing your past wounds.”

Tap Into Your Intuition

“Past experiences are all stored in our brains, and while we may not be actively thinking about them, our brain can access them when it needs to. It uses those past experiences and cues from our environment and our sense of self and all comes together to give us those gut feelings we call intuition. 

Your body and your brain can interpret your environment faster than you can, so when you get a “bad feeling” it doesn’t mean you’re overreacting or being “crazy”–it means that there is something there, some element of your environment that triggered that knowledge in the back recesses of your brain before you could piece it together yourself.”

Explore Spirituality

“At its core, spirituality is about connecting with your world. It’s about finding your values, and finding ways to live your life with them in mind. It’s about finding your purpose, your connection to others, your connection to the world around you. Spirituality, whatever form it shows up in, is how we make sense of the time we’re given in this world.

Spiritual wellness just means that you are asking yourself the question “What does it mean for me to be spiritually fulfilled?” and then doing your best to incorporate practices that help you achieve that fulfilment.”

What are you looking forward to in 2022? If you’re looking for more support as you shift your routines in the new year, talking with a therapist can help.

5 Ways to Cultivate Creativity

5 Ways to Cultivate Creativity

How creative are you? Creativity often brings to mind artists or musicians, but there are infinite ways to be creative. You might not consider yourself creative at all, and that’s okay. We tend to think of creativity as something that you either have or don’t, but the truth is that you can become more creative. Cultivating creativity can help boost your self-esteem, improve your work performance, and leave you feeling more fulfilled. 

Every person has the ability to be creative, but we don’t always nurture that ability. Creativity is definitely seen as important to a degree, but we also prize productivity and there’s a myth that creativity can get in the way of that. In fact, the opposite is true. Creativity can help boost productivity in and out of the workplace by helping people to thinking outside the box and problem solve in new ways. 

Even though creativity is a part of everything, some people frown on creativity or think that creating isn’t a worthwhile way to spend time. We all have responsibilities and commitments, but we also all deserve to feel joy and rest. There can be a balance between being creative and being productive, if that’s what you want. Creativity itself can also help with productivity - you can see multiple points of view and approach problems from new perspectives, which can help get things done.

If you’re interested in cultivating creativity in yourself, there are some steps you can take to encourage that! Here are our top tips to cultivate creativity: 

Be curious

One of the keys to creativity is curiosity. Creative folks ask questions. They want to know and understand more. Keep track of the things that make you curious. You can keep a list on your phone or in a journal to see what draws your attention. What are you drawn to? What do you want to know more about? If you’re still getting stuck, go back into your memories. What made you curious as a kid? What were you drawn to back then? Chances are, you still like a lot of that same stuff. See how it feels to explore it now, as an adult. 

Build your confidence

It can be hard to be creative if you don’t have confidence in yourself. Creating is vulnerable. You’re making something out of yourself, and it can be hard to feel confident in sharing that with others. Some folks feel impostor syndrome about creativity - where they feel they aren’t creative enough, they’re just pretending. If that comes up for you, building up your confidence is a helpful step. Set yourself up to succeed at something. If you’re nervous about sharing your creative side with others, pick one person close to you to talk about it with. Pick someone who is a big fan of yours and will be enthusiastic about it. Once you have one good interaction under your belt, it might be easier to talk about. 

Set up a ritual

Sometimes it’s hard to get in the habit of being creative when it’s not something you’re used to. Rituals can help you get in the right mindset to be creative so your brain knows it’s time to create. You can have a simple ritual like lighting a candle before sitting in your creative space, or you can be more involved. Find something that works for you. It can also be helpful to try to tap into your creative energy in a designated space. This isn’t to limit your ability to be creative, but to help you focus on creativity while you’re in that space. Is there a corner where you can set up a little table and keep the things that inspire you? Decorate the area with things that make you feel inspired or curious to stoke that creative fire. 

Be consistent

Another aspect of creativity is consistency. People that are creative are consistently committed to creativity. They make time for it, whether or not they feel like it, and whether or not they produce something. Creativity is like a muscle, and using it over and over will make it easier to access in the future. Set aside a regular chunk of time every week to devote yourself to being creative. You don’t have to have any goals other than have a good time. You don’t have to make anything social media worthy or perfect. Just enjoy yourself and the rest will follow.

Remember that failure is normal

Finally, it’s important to remember that failure is a part of life. It’s really hard to be creative when you’re paralyzed by the fear of failure or rejection. Creativity is about the journey, not the destination. So if you create something that doesn’t work out or doesn’t do well, that doesn’t mean it was a waste of time! At the very least, you’ve learned more about what doesn’t work and that can help you next time. If the fear of not being successful or good enough is holding you back, consider what it would feel like to live your whole life without exploring your creative side. That would probably feel pretty bad, right? If you’re still concerned about what people will think or if you’ll be judged, try to release yourself from the expectations of other people. Your job is to do what’s right for you, and you’re the expert on your own life. You get to decide what works for you! 

If you’re looking for more ways to expand your creativity, therapy can be a great place to explore it. Our clinicians can help you find ways to support your particular creative style, so get in touch today!