20 Journal Prompts for Grief + Loss

Do you take the time to journal?

Journaling can be a very valuable practice, and best of all it’s a pretty cheap way to process your feelings. You can start a journal that’s specific to your feelings of grief, or you can keep a general journal for all of your thoughts. There are also no rules on the actual how of journaling: you can journal by hand, via an app, in a note on your phone, or wherever works for you. Your journal, however you decide to keep it, is just a private space for you to write down what you’re feeling. It can take whatever form you want it to, whether it’s exploring and releasing the emotions you’re feeling, coming up with ways to cope, or tracking the things that are making you anxious. Journaling can be a fantastic, active way to engage with our emotions without letting them overpower us, especially complex emotions like grief that we don’t always have a ton of experience with. 

Grief is something that we all experience from time to time, but it’s a hard thing to talk about. It’s also important to remember that grief can be a response to all kinds of things, not just losing someone.  While most folks are familiar with the grief associated with loss or death, there are many kinds of grief out there - you can grieve after a divorce, career change, loss of a pet, or even after a move, and that’s not a complete list.  As a matter of fact, the definition of grief is not only the reaction to loss, but it can also encompass “the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior.” You can also experience anticipatory grief, which is grief caused by the anticipation of a loss. This kind of grief can be the result of losing someone after a long illness, worrying about loss as someone ages, or even after anticipating the kind of loss and destruction that a global pandemic can bring. Grief is a pretty universal experience, but everyone reacts in their own way to grief. 

Journaling can help with meaning-making during the grief process. An important task during the grieving process is to figure out what your new life looks like after experiencing loss. Using a journal to work through your thoughts and feelings can help you construct a new self-narrative. If writing about tough topics like grief and loss has you feeling emotional, that’s totally normal. In fact, crying is a natural way to relieve stress and regulate emotions - it’s a physiological function that we’re born with, so if you have the urge to cry or get upset, try to allow yourself to feel those feelings. Taking the time to journal your feelings can help you explore your internal world, express yourself in a safe, judgment-free zone, and make meaning of the situation causing you grief. 

If you’re grieving and looking to start a journal, you might be stuck on where to begin. Here are some prompts to help you get started:

• Today, I miss…

• When I feel upset, I can call…

• Today, I remembered…

• This experience has taught me…

• Do I have any regrets about this situation? 

• If I could say something to you, I would say…

• What are some ways you’ve expressed grief in the past? Did they feel helpful to you?

• What feelings am I looking forward to? What feelings do I want to leave behind? 

• Write a list of activities that you can engage in to make yourself feel better

• Do I feel comfortable asking for help? Why or why not? 

• Who is in my support system? 

• Make a list of ways you feel taken care of both by yourself and by others. 

• What’s a positive memory I have of this person or situation? 

• How did this person or experience make you feel? 

• If you are grieving the loss of a person, write down a list of things specific to them that you admired. 

• What creative ways do I use to express my feelings? If I can’t think of any, what are some I can try? 

• Make a list of a few different ways you can honor your loved one or your loss.

• When I am overcome by grief, here is a mantra or affirmation I can use to comfort myself: 

• Here are five ways I can be compassionate with myself today…

• Do I know anyone else who is grieving? How can I try to make them feel better today? 

You don’t need to write something for every one of these prompts, just pick one or two that speak to you and start there. You don’t have to write anything profound or perfect - just write what comes to you and try not to judge yourself too harshly. If a lot of complicated feelings come up while you do this, know that that’s okay. Journaling is a fantastic tool for self-reflection, but it can be an emotional process, especially when you’re journaling about something as emotionally fraught as grief, so be gentle with yourself. Remember, you’re doing this to help yourself feel better, so don’t make yourself feel worse during the process.

If you need more ideas for journaling prompts or questions to ask yourself as you go through the grieving process, our counselors can help you reflect + work through your grief in a way that works for you. 

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