4 Practical Ways to Build New Habits
4 Practical Ways to Build New Habits
Have you ever tried to build a new habit?
It can be surprisingly difficult to start doing something new regularly. Doing one small new thing a day (or not doing something) might sound simple, but our brains are complicated, so it doesn’t always end up being that way.
Thankfully, we know a lot more about the human brain than we used to, which can help us make sense of how habits are built in our nervous system. It’s absolutely possible to build new habits that improve your life, it just takes some patience.
Habits are “a settled or regular tendency or practice,” or something that you do without really thinking about it. It might be brushing your teeth in the morning, or taking your dog for a walk. A habit tends to be sort of automatic, and such a routine part of your life that it feels strange when you don’t do it.
Why are habits hard to break and hard to build?
It comes down to our brains. When our brains notice that we do something over and over, they try to make life easier by making a sort of shortcut for that action. Our brains spend all day long taking action, so when they can use a shortcut, it’s usually helpful. These shortcuts are called neural pathways.
Our brains work by sending electrical signals to our neurons from one area to another. When that path gets used over and over, our brains learn and develop a new neural pathway to send the message more efficiently. This is why after a certain period of time habits become so ingrained that you don’t even really have to think about them.
Sometimes improving your life isn’t about adding in a new habit, but breaking an old one that is no longer serving you. Breaking habits is just as difficult as building one, because your brain wants to use that neural pathway it’s created for you. It takes time to teach your brain that you’re not using that one anymore.
So, you want to learn a new habit? Here are 4 practical ways to build new habits:
Unlearn myths about habits
There are a lot of myths out there about habits. One of the most common myths is that it takes just 21 days to build a new habit. This might be true for some people, but it’s not the case for most. For many people, it can take months to develop a habit. If you’ve felt frustrated in the past that you weren’t able to establish a new habit in 21 days, know that you are not the problem! The expectation that we can re-wire our brains in 3 weeks is often what leads people to feel frustrated.
Another problematic myth about habits is that they are good or bad. As with much in life, things are rarely that black and white. There's a gray area that's important to notice.
Instead of trying to view habits as good or bad, try to assess them by whether they’re supportive or unsupportive. Does this habit help you feel good about yourself and meet your goals? Does it align with your values? Does it support who you are now, or is it no longer necessary?
When you shift from thinking about habits in terms of good and bad, it’s easier to remove the judgment you feel and treat yourself with compassion.
Try habit stacking
Remember those neural pathways we talked about earlier? Those shortcuts give you a built-in hack to start a new habit. A habit stack is when you put a new habit alongside one you’ve already mastered.
So, if you’d like to develop a habit where you spend time meditating each day, try sticking it next to a habit you already do daily - like brewing coffee or charging your phone. When you’re done getting your coffee ready, jump right into meditation until it’s ingrained. It’s easier to remember to fold in a new habit alongside an established one, instead of forgetting half of the time.
Examine barriers
A lot of times when we try to implement new habits, we only do so in optimal conditions, like when we’re feeling healthy and not too stressed. When life inevitably gets in the way of your new routine, it can be tricky to keep up! Often new habits are the first things we drop in times of overwhelm, because they’re not ingrained in the neural networks in our brains yet. So when you’re building a new habit, it’s important to zoom out and look for potential barriers that could get in the way of this new habit.
Do you struggle to get the laundry done because you don’t have a set time in your schedule? Or maybe because you have to travel to the laundromat, and when your schedule gets busy you don’t have time? Whatever the barrier is, write it down, and try to come up with as many solutions as possible to give yourself opportunities to overcome what’s getting in the way of this new habit. Having a plan for when those barriers happen will help you feel less overwhelmed when they do pop up.
Go slow
You’re not going to be able to completely overhaul your habits overnight. It can be a fun energy boost to start a new habit, but try to avoid the temptation to do too much at once and build your habits one at a time.
If you try to do too much too fast, you run the risk of burning yourself out instead of being able to stick with the habit for the long haul. Work on one habit at a time so you can have time to build that new neural pathway so the habit becomes almost automatic. Once you have to think less about the habit to get it done, you can add in the next one.
Have patience and compassion with yourself because you’re doing your best! Our brains are complicated and take more time to learn than you might like. You’re worthy of compassion anyway!